lost.

from the moment she lost her last breathe, the wake, the funeral, the cremation... replays every now and then.. not only that, those happy memories we shared, those last few days we had with her, those and those... i will think about them every night before i sleep.

i lost my direction in life.

what's the purpose of studying?
what the hell am i doing?

i don't know.. i really don't know.


help.


saw jenn's post... i can't help feeling sucky. sucky in term of, can't do anything to make things better for her. i know whatever i do, i can't make anything better. just like if i were to convocate next year, i will be very emo too. what's convocation without mum being around?


but deep in my heart, i'm contented and thankful that i still have mum with me during my 21st.